The key turns easily in our heavy door's lock, welcoming me home, as always I cross the carpet pausing only to drop my school bag onto the old leather armchair on my way to the table where my laptop awaits. Computer on, itunes open, facebook open and msn signed in...I'll be set for quite a while. My msn screenname flashes up at me, Eros with my personal message scrawled below if they give you lined paper, write the other way. I can't connect to the girl who wrote these, she seems a distant stranger. I felt so smart when I settled on Eros for my screenname, an anagram of my own name which means love in greek, on a more subtle level I felt it expressed my contempt for stereotypical gender bias as Eros was a son of greek mythology. As for my personal message, I felt it marked me as literary...I have no idea why this seemed important. At any rate, I haven't changed them for so long it would seem strange to. Unsettling somehow.
Flicking over to my facebook page, hers is the first face to catch my eye- as it always is. It's only been 6 months and no one can bear to shut down this last fragile connection with Ally. I surrender willingly to the memories, letting them wash over me for as long as I can bear...I see her face watching me like she's right there, I relive her last week, strained in the hospital with rare moments of laughter interspersed, I could still laugh when she was with me.
"Rose!" Oh no, mums home, and I'm not studying. Again. Let the games begin.
RJx
2 comments:
gosh leave me hangin wont you :p
its good, Im hooked!!
Apologies my beautiful ets! I had to go :(.
I'll write more for you tonight once my parents friends leave, or tomorrow I promise.
I'm glad you're enjoying it though. Do you honestly like it? You're such a good friend I can't be sure haha. Not to late for me to start again. xo
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